Hi! This would be the first of many anecdotes that I want to document and share with myself, my family, and all the people who have supported me over the years and also to everyone who might find this useful and relatable. First and foremost, a big thanks to everyone – my mother, my father, my grandmother, my sister and to my loving partner Yanrong. You have been a constant in my life over the years, without your support and occasional scoldings, I wouldn’t be where I am right now. You lifted me with your values, kind words (sometimes harsh 😏) and made me a better person, a better scientist, a better son and a better soon-to-be husband.

My journey began, like any other, in a small city in India called Durgapur. Not a shabby old place as one would picture, but quite decent with enough urban and natural beauty. I would not say the city is anywhere near posh, but it had everything a small family would need – right, I forgot we had a small family then, just me, my father, my mother. How our family has grown – it’s quite unbelievable. Anyway, I was a handful, always kept my parents on their toes, well, I was on my toes all the time, barely touching the ground. I was a hurricane running, sometimes breaking stuff and even curious enough to touch candle flames. I gather one might call me “that kid who used to annoy everyone with a wicked smile (rather mischief)”. It’s still a wonder how my parents and my teachers managed my annoyance. We were a lower-middle-class family, but my parents always provided me with the best of everything and shielded me from the harshness of the real world. But I was raised in an environment of discipline and learning thanks to my parents and my grandmother. Every night was a debate, and every morning was constant study sessions. In the beginning, I didn’t really care for the studies, but I always had a knack for learning, thanks to my father and grandmother, who introduced me to the world of books. As time passed, I grew quite fond of learning and exploring new things, fixing things, playing with electronics (to the level where I had encumbered our home’s electricity connection on multiple occasions – it was fun! hehe!), computers, and gaming. I distinctly remember two of my fondest memories from my childhood – First, when my sister was born, I smiled as I rocked my kid sister to sleep on my lap, annoying and fighting with her over food, my mother’s and grandmother’s attention, and every other little thing we could find. Second, my love for physics and mathematics, I used to have pictures of Feynman, Einstein and Hawking on my walls, it was littered with Feynman diagrams, relativity equations, bits of calculus, Euler’s theorems and so on. I used to go to sleep listening to Feynman lectures, just jamming to it till I could dream of the grandness of the entire cosmos and explore infinity at the edge of the universe. It was intoxicating for me!

As I mentioned, my parents always supported my quest of learning new things, they also arranged the best tutors for me. Honest Confession: I am lucky to have had a pantheon of great teachers and professors who supported and nurtured my curiosity, answering every little, stupid question I asked them. While most of them answered, not everyone was adding fuel to the flame of my curiosity (still have memories of some pretty awful confrontations! Maybe I’ll talk about that some other day). It was quite fun, except it cost a fortune for all the education.

But honestly, I can positively say not everything was smooth in my life. My time in school was the worst time of my life. I couldn’t fit in, felt like a foreigner in my own country. It was hard, maybe it wasn’t their fault, it was just me being me. And me being me, I spent most of my time in the school library or playing football. My values, ideals, aspirations and interests always clashed with my peers, except for one or two, and I felt out of place. Only at home I felt at peace, until my mother hollered me into studying for the exams, I liked learning! Not exams!! By that time, I had built up quite high expectations from my parents and teachers. It wasn’t ideal for me, the stress was too much, and I got careless, rather carefree after a minor success in my secondary exams. So when I wasn’t able to get into the best university, it hit me hard. It shattered my dreams, and I let everyone down, especially myself. I was in a dark place, I couldn’t see past my failures. I remember how much my parents invested in everything, all the hard work my father did, taking me to Kolkata to learn advanced mathematics. I am still haunted by that sometimes. The failure to live up to my expectations was slowly engulfing me. And right before that, I also lost my dearest friend and teacher to a freak accident. Everything together made me miserable. I had thoughts of quitting, giving up and just be done with everything. But even then, even when I gave up, my family didn’t; my father always encouraged me to do what I wanted to do. He reminded me of all the work I have done; they have done it for my betterment, not to be a slave to a colonial system of education. My mother took my failures a little harder, as she knew “what my son is capable of!” (her words), but even she came around to support me. Then I remember I loved doing mathematics, computer science and physics, not to get a job or degree, I did it because I enjoy doing this, I do it for the fun of it. It made me free!

I think after that, I never looked back again. I had a mission, I had a target, and it was to remove the tag of my current college. Oh! I chose to study computer science, courtesy of my friend and teacher whom I talked about before; it was to honour his memory, but also, I found the best way to enjoy doing mathematics and physics was through computer science. I hope he is proud of me and smiling at me from the great beyond. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of him, the memories came back when my grandfather passed away in front of me. Even though I was not so close with my granddad (mother’s father) as I am with my grandma (Father’s mother). But I know he loved me, I also have fond memories of him taking me to buy sweets, telling me stories. It was hard, but I kept it to myself, I had to be strong, and I dealt with it in my own way. But perhaps he has been watching over me after all, as I found another friend and teacher during my bachelor’s. Meeting Professor Avijit Gayen was perhaps one of the profound moments during that time, and was a godsend. I was finally able to connect with someone who shared my interests and values. I learnt a great deal from him, and I truly only consider him as my dearest friend and teacher. In the following course of time, I took up a job as an engineer in a firm, I just have two words to describe my time there - unproductive and tiring. I never wanted to work like that; I wanted to be a scientist, a researcher, but I didn’t have a direction. So, like anyone in my situation would do (perhaps just me!) I quit my job and came to Ireland to study Master’s and eventually work here. I was finally successful in doing what I was set to do – I was now studying at University College Cork, a significant improvement. It was a good moment when I got the offer. In Ireland, I did many things, learned, taught, cooked fries and burgers, repaired doors, restocked supplies and finally even worked at UCC as a researcher.

Everything I did taught me many valuable life lessons, for which I am very grateful. In all the time before, I felt empty, the world was black and white. I was enjoying my work, but it felt like sailing in the endless ocean on a boat with no oars to navigate. I was alone. I have always been alone my whole life except for my sister, my parents, and my grandma. But then I found her! My partner, “my force” (unwanted Star Wars reference! lol!), my better half, Ye Yanrong. We were from different worlds, countries that had troubled pasts, with prior negative conceptions of each other. Yet it didn’t stop us! It made us stronger. She filled a void in my heart and life that I didn’t think anyone could fill. She became the Sun to my Moon, my better half! We met most unexpectedly, fell in love (I did! First! lol) unexpectedly; perhaps it has been our destiny. She has made me a better person. I finally knew what I wanted to do in my life, what I wanted to be. We had our ups and downs, but she always stood by me, motivated me, guided me, scolded me and lifted me. For me, I found my best friend, my partner in crime, my audience for my singing, cooking, jokes, and everything in her. We had our fights, and we had moments we both cried, we also had moments of joy, laughter and happiness. All those experiences shaped us in these two years. We have become a family, and both our families welcomed us with open arms. It was all like a fairy tale (‘Tong Hua’) moment for both of us. I can’t wait for what the future holds for us! I know I will be there by her side always. Fortunately for us, fate again brought us together as I began my doctorate at Shanghai Jiao Tong University, one of the best in the world, and another goal I couldn’t have achieved without the great people along the way supporting me.